Kristin Armstrong’s April 2020 Column: Seeing the World with Fresh Eyes
"I can hold the energy of love, hope, healing and possibility regardless of circumstance"
I recently got my windows washed. It’s a rite of spring, so I figured I may as well. But it was expensive, so I wasn’t too happy about that part. Until I saw my windows — or rather, saw through my windows. It’s funny how you have no idea how dirty something is until after it’s clean.
Nothing changed about the gorgeous trees, the sky or the sunlight streaming through. Those were there the whole time, but I couldn’t see them the way I see them now. I didn’t need a new view; I needed only to clean my windows or change my lens.
This goes far beyond a spring cleaning recommendation. This is a life lesson, a game changer, a way to elevate our entire experience of life, work, relationships, parenting and love. This is beyond a wardrobe transition into spring style: it’s about shifting into a new season of being. Sometimes the Universe has to give me a message in several different ways before I can fully receive, then share it. For a complete shift to occur, I need to read it, hear it, observe it in myself and others, think about it, feel it emotionally and recognize the sensation in my body. Then, watch out. I get it; and when I get something — really get it — I am all in. And I want others all in with me, if it is amazing and they are willing. So, here it is.
I can hold the energy of love, hope, healing and possibility regardless of circumstance.”
The thing about our lens is this: We see what we are looking for. If our “windows are dirty,” we are on the lookout for negativity. We look for what’s wrong, what could go wrong, what could be better but isn’t, what feels disappointing, what is missing, what hurts, what others have that we think we don’t, what is difficult, what feels heavy or oppressive, why we don’t deserve something, why we aren’t enough, why we don’t have enough, why we can’t do something, why something isn’t meant to be, isn’t worth it or is even impossible.
And guess what? We find all of that shit and more shit just like it. I had a beautiful relationship that fell apart because of dirty windows, not because of the relationship. I will never make that mistake again. Once I learn something, especially the hard way, it’s mine.
Now, I clean my windows every morning by setting my intention for what I want to see, how I want to feel and how I want others to feel in my presence. It goes something like this:
Today is a new day. Today I am choosing to see my life, everything and everyone in it, through a lens of Love and appreciation. I allow myself to be exactly where I am, and others to be where they are. Nothing is wrong. Nothing is broken. Nothing needs to be fixed. I can be with people who are in difficult places without personalizing the difficulty. I can hold the energy of love, hope, healing and possibility regardless of circumstance. In this way, I can live and radiate Unconditional Love. I choose to release outcomes and resistance to what I perceive as uncertain or uncomfortable. I open to my highest good and my deliberate expansion, and I invite others to do the same. I choose to enjoy my people, savoring time and connection with them. I look for the good on each of their horizons, and I find it. If they can’t see it, I see it anyway, and I hold it gently for them in spiritual escrow.
I recognize that any feelings of negativity, resentment, lack or longing are only an indicator that I am out of alignment with my Self, nothing more. I take full responsibility for shifting my perspective and energy back into alignment. I recalibrate and move on, owning and inhabiting my freedom and happiness. I will look for treasures hidden along my path, reasons to feel great and opportunities to love and laugh and serve — and I will find them. I intend to move through this day with kindness, confidence, courage, ease, fun and flow. I enjoy the unfolding and step into the fullness of all that I have become.
I intend for my life to be an amazing adventure. And so it is.